Tuesday, November 29, 2011


We all know of the ridiculosity I've been dealing with in my apartment complex.
  • They didn't have my lease ready when I got here
  • no new carpeting in my apartment, which I was promised
  • the cockroach problem
  • the bed bug problem
  • the "me no habla espanol" problem
  • the kitchen light being broken problem (which they "fixed" on 11/22 - its still broken)

But there is a whole other problem I have with this place: the white girl in the office. Or "blondie" as Mom and I so nicely refer to her.

This girl has got to be the dumbest box of rocks I have ever come across. Today marks not the first, but the SECOND time she has called me to tell me that I owe back rent. I'm at work, my phone rings, and I see its the apartment complex. Obviously I'm going to answer - my dog is home by herself, the place could be on fire, those giant ants from the Orkin commercial could be invading. 

"Hey Helen its 'Blondie', are you busy?"
"What's up?"
"Well do you have time to talk?"
"I'm at work, what's up?"
"Well I don't want to bother you at work."
"WHAT IS UP? You called for a reason."
"Well I know this is probably the last thing you want to hear....................................but remember there was some confusion about your pet when you moved in?"
(Note: there was no confusion about Bailey when I moved in. None. At all. There was confusion about what prorated rent I had to pay, which after I paid it they called and told me it was the wrong amount. I then disputed and they realized I was right. So here I think she's going to say something along the lines of we think your dog is a pitbull and you have to leave. Which at this point, if they asked me to leave, I would be running out of here.)
"Well it turns out that you owe $32 in back pet rent. Your rent is ____ and the pet rent is $20, so you owe $32."
(This math doesn't work for me - my rent ends in a 0 and so does 20, so I'm not sure where the $32 is coming from.)
"No I don't. My pet rent is included in that amount."
"....No it's not."
"'Blondie', we've been over my rent amount multiple times. I don't owe any other money."
"Can you check your lease for me when you get home? I need to talk to you about this and I don't think we're going to end up agreeing."
"Are you looking at my lease right now? I won't be home until 6, but I can leave a message for you after I check it."
"I don't have your lease in front of me, can you call me in the morning? I should be here by 8."
"I'm at work by 745, so no. I can't. Pull my paperwork and then call me back."
"We really need to get this straightened out."
"Pull. My. Paperwork. And. Call. Me. Back."

Fifteen minutes later:
"Oh, you know, it turns out you were right, you don't owe us anything. There was a glitch in the system when corporate did their audit and once I pulled your lease I figured out the problem."
"Great, you might have wanted to do that before you called to harass me to pay money that I don't ACTUALLY owe. And can you get maintenance to come fix my kitchen light? I've asked 3 times, they came in on 11/22 and left a work order, and its still broken."
"Oh well I think there was some confusion, and its first come first serve, so I can't guarantee when they will be coming."

Big FRACKING help. And obviously I know what my lease says! I signed the damn thing! Now, dear readers, if you were calling someone to essentially accuse them of not paying something - wouldn't you get your shit together and make sure that you had all of your information correct, so when they disputed it, you had the proof right in front of you? I've already submitted a complaint to corporate. I cannot wait to get out of this place.

**EDIT** A woman from corporate called me this morning so I complained, and if I have any further issues I'm just going to her first. And my kitchen light is fixed, with a new cover too. Its a wonder what complaining and threatening a lawyer will do.

No comments:

Post a Comment